Good Day all,
Again I appreciate all of the support and comments, and I apologise for not responding, its taken so long to get progress at the hospital, a change of consultant, more scans, lumber punctures, however I am finally at a stage, where I am now advised I qualify for DMD, they want to start me on Copaxone, and yet more MRI’s I understand as a baseline.
Im anxious about the side effects, and i’m also anxious I get another infection in the winter that will have another impact on my partial mylenation. Im anxious about having to push a needle into my body/leg 3xtimes a week, is this for the rest of my life? – and keep asking the questions to myself, around will I inevitably end up in a wheelchair, walking stick, loss of speech. I google, I youtube, and I take some inspiration, but I also read scare stories……. in saying that, no one wants this, this is the path thats been chosen, and I just have to buckle down and get on with it.
Since Feb I have also stopped exercising, put on weight, and anxious to play golf, play sports, run, in case I get another attack, I feel like its ground hog day, every time I wrestle these feelings/thoughts on a regular basis.
Im not the person to convey feelings, but with this I and the more I write I can open up about my inner struggle, I am scared more than I ever have been in my life, and the impact it will have on my family, my aging parents, who have had their share of health issues themselves. and then I just break at the thought this will have on my darling daughter, who really is my world.
Or I man up attack this, do as much as possible, my Dr advised I should look to change diet and remove red meat and dairy as they are inflammatory foods.
Or I man up and take inspiration from my grandads favourite poem – If
thank you for listening