With MS, holiday prepping is about shifting the bar, not lowering it
For me, the key is knowing my limits and communicating them to others
The holidays tend to arrive with a mix of excitement and stress, even for people without a chronic illness. But for those of us living with multiple sclerosis (MS), the season can feel like its own kind of marathon, full of expectations, overscheduling, symptoms that flare when we least want them to, and the pressure to be “on” when our bodies are asking for the opposite.
Over the years, I’ve learned that preparing for the holidays with MS isn’t about lowering the bar. It’s about shifting the bar to a place that actually supports us.
The first thing I remind myself every November is that pacing myself isn’t a weakness; it’s a strategy. While everyone else is sprinting from event to event, I treat the season like a long-distance race and allow myself to say no when needed. People may not always understand, but that’s OK; they don’t have to. Protecting my energy now means I’m more present for the moments I do choose.
Not all ‘merry and bright’
I let the people I’m spending the holidays with know what I can handle and what I can’t. Maybe that means arriving a little later, leaving earlier, or skipping a second gathering altogether. Maybe it means having a quiet space to step away when my symptoms spike. Sometimes it’s telling someone ahead of time, “If I disappear for a bit, I’m just resting.”
For a long time, I tried to push through and keep up, fearing that I would be seen as difficult or dramatic. But the truth is, communicating my needs makes the day smoother for everyone, and it keeps me from crashing. People can’t support me if they don’t know what’s going on.
Of course, MS never forgets to bring unpredictable symptoms to the party. Cold weather stiffness, holiday travel fatigue, and sensory overload from loud gatherings can all hit at once. So I make a “holiday toolkit” ahead of time: meds, comfortable clothes, a plan for breaks, and an exit strategy if I start to crash. Knowing I have options helps me relax rather than brace for what might happen.
And then there’s the emotional side. Holidays can highlight old grief — the way our bodies used to function, the traditions we used to observe, or the energy we used to have. I try to honor those feelings instead of forcing myself to be cheerful.
MS teaches us over and over that joy and grief can sit in the same room. The season becomes easier when I stop insisting it must all be merry and bright.
Note: Multiple Sclerosis News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Multiple Sclerosis News Today or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to multiple sclerosis.
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