Because multiple sclerosis (MS) is so unpredictable, many of us experience a silent battle of grieving what was, while simultaneously navigating what will become of our lives. It might seem to an outsider that the sorrow comes from mourning only the loss of major milestones, but we also deal…
Authentically Human - Desiree Lama
Desiree Lama is a 20-something-year-old PhD student living in Austin, Texas. She was diagnosed with relapsing-remitting multiple sclerosis during high school at only 17 years old but began experiencing symptoms at 14. Since a young age, she has found a safe haven in writing because her grandma fostered her love for words and learning. Desiree lives her life through being authentically human in a superficial world. In this column, she will share personal memos of being a disabled, bisexual Mexican woman in an overcritical world. Desiree hopes that this column will encapsulate the captivatingly burdensome feelings of human existence, especially for those with MS.
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One of the most exhausting parts of living with multiple sclerosis (MS) isn’t always the symptoms themselves. Sometimes, it’s the constant guessing game. Every ache, twinge, headache, moment of fatigue, or lapse in memory can send me down a mental rabbit hole. Is this MS? Am I experiencing a…
During my sophomore year of high school, my class schedule was changed against my wishes, resulting in me having to enroll in a theater class for the semester. Although I had dabbled in choir during middle school, band was where my heart resided. I had no interest in pursuing other…
Dear family and friends, Over the years, I have wondered how my diagnosis of relapsing-remitting multiple sclerosis has impacted your worlds, as well. Just as I am unable to convey the impact of its collision with the life as I once knew, I imagine those words don’t necessarily come…
Every year, warmer weather arrives with a collective exhale as people spend more time outdoors, enjoying sunlight that stretches into the evening and patio dinners. But for me, living with multiple sclerosis (MS), the arrival of summer lands more like a quiet tightening in my chest. I find myself…
Living with multiple sclerosis has taught me that some of the hardest symptoms to explain are the ones no one else can see. For me, one of those is itchiness. Not the kind that comes from dry skin or a mosquito bite, but something deeper, more unsettling. It…
I have written about how much I enjoyed helping my grandma tend to her garden as a child, in the years before I was diagnosed with relapsing-remitting multiple sclerosis. She instilled in me a great love for plants and for being outdoors. But with multiple sclerosis (MS)…
As I write this, the April showers that bring May flowers have brought forth a string of gloomy days here in central Texas. During days like these, I cannot help but be reminded of my grandma, who passed away about a year ago after a battle with dementia. I remember…
Multiple sclerosis (MS) is a chronic neurological condition wherein the immune system attacks the protective covering of nerves. This clinical definition accurately portrays the medical reality, but it doesn’t encapsulate the lived reality. It doesn’t account for the ways in which fatigue can feel like gravity doubling overnight…
Dealing with multiple sclerosis (MS) — including the numerous symptoms that manifest differently for each person, the grief, and the uncertainty — is grueling. On top of all that, there’s the added challenge of navigating the American healthcare system. As I have written before, I’ve dealt with migraines…
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