Checking Out a Dating App for People with Health Problems
Does your MS limit your ability to find a date?
Dating isn’t a concern of mine, since I turned 70 earlier this month and have been happily married for 42 years. But younger, single folks with MS regularly post concerns about starting relationships on various MS social media sites that I follow.
Now there’s a dating app that might help make that social connection easier. It’s called Lemonayde. The dating app’s creator started Lemonayde because he discovered that starting a relationship was easier for him when he and his new girlfriend shared the same medical condition.
In promotional material for the app, Lemonayde’s creator, Niko, puts it this way:
“My first relationship started in college and it was with someone
who also had a skin condition (psoriasis). It may sound weird, but I initially fought off this relationship only because I knew she also had a skin condition. I don’t know why, but I guess I just didn’t want to convince myself that I’m only supposed to date people who were ‘like me’ (whatever that means). But I was also keeping myself away from something great. It was just a strange confusing paradox. Fortunately, I lost that fight and we started dating and it was a wonderful relationship. We bonded about things only we would be able to understand. We skipped the whole ‘worrying about my condition’ phase and just went straight to the fun part.”
My first reaction to the app was that if I were young and single, I wouldn’t want to be dating someone with MS. But Niko says the idea of his app is to “give a push” to someone who might not otherwise have the courage to enter the dating world. “I think we can all agree that no one wants to hear the phrase ‘sick people should just date sick people,'” he writes. “The mission is to help make sure that you’re comfortable with who you are, without feeling like you have to apologize for your condition; especially when it comes to dating.”
Checking out the Lemonayde dating app
After downloading the app I was asked to enter my name (only a first name is fine), my age and location, a maximum distance to look for a match, the gender that I’m interested in dating, and an age range for that person. It also asks for, but doesn’t require, some information “about me” and a picture. To this point, it’s just like your average dating app … I guess. I’ve never used one. 🙂
Unlike the average dating app, however, it also asks you for “health challenges/life challenges.” That info is optional, but it’s also what the app is all about. Once you’re signed up, you can swipe to browse for free, but you need to become a paying customer to right-swipe to connect with someone.
I found no users near the beach community where I live, but many if I broadened my search to include a major, metropolitan area. They listed dozens of “Health challenges,” including some that are common, such as diabetes, fibromyalgia, migraines, RA, and epilepsy. There were also some that are not so common, like Ehlers-Danlos syndrome and Marfan syndrome. People listed MS but, surprisingly, not that many.
The cost to use Lemonayde to connect with someone ranges from $6.99 for one month to $47.99 for a year. Would I buy the ability to right-swipe if I was young and single again? I’m really not sure. What would you do?
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Johan
I would not. Of course I am almost 50. Single, divorced about 12 years now, no children and diagnosed with SPMS 6.5 years ago. I stopped working 4 years ago. In the past few years there have been a few dates. One with a woman who’s MS was worse than mine. After that experience I decided that if I ever entered into a committed relationship with a significant other it might be nice if both of us weren’t as disabled as I. Maybe. Of course, you never know. But of all the topics concerning life with MS, romantic love is a favorite of mine. I have a potential date next week with a non-MS’er and a woman I have had my eye on for some time now used my first name when saying goodbye the other day. Very exciting. I have yet to give in to the ways of the brave new world and when it comes to dating may never. Alas, my journey through life here on out may be lived as a single person, but the journey continues nonetheless, and I shall persist enthusiastically the dreamer that I am. Thanks for posting Ed
JE
Ed Tobias
Hi Johan,
Thanks for your comments and good luck with your date next week.
Ed
Johan
Thanks Ed. Perhaps I'll write about it in the near future.
JE
Aphrodite Kon
Had many of the same concerns....I too am a dreamer and hope someday to meet someone special.....Hoping you've had some success and if you did please share with me.....Thank you!!!
Polly
I would try the app if it were free.
Sars
Agreed. Something about paying to meet someone as hard as it is feels defeating.
Melissa
I don't want to be single anymore. The thought of dating someone with ms is comforting but i don't want to pay
Eoghan
Nice idea but won't really work for me - I live too far away and the adjust location features don't work for me
David Train
I have ms and I'm trying and hoping to date someone that could lead to marriage
Michelle
I am 49 and have Relapsing/Remitting MS. Married, but my husband never likes to talk about my MS. Very lonely feeling in my heart. No children.
Rob
If you need to talk and get things off your mind I'm sure there are peeps here thatwould love to chat
Jalen
Hey,
How are you? I’ve had MS since I was 16 and found it very difficult to find someone that can relate. I too have RRMS and while I’m sure it effects us differently, I would love to hear about your battle with it.
Christin in Colorado
I think paying for it weeds out scammers for the most part, that alone is worth a small fee.
Paul williams
What Dmt treatment are you taking