New year, new ways of approaching rest and relaxtion

I want to be on the receiving end when my body calls me to lay off work

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by Desiree Lama |

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The beginning of the new year is an opportunity for a fresh start, change, and personal growth. Even before I was diagnosed with relapsing-remitting multiple sclerosis, I struggled deeply to allow myself moments of rest and peace, and that continues today. I’m aware of those struggles, but until now I hadn’t made any effort to change my ways.

I want to listen to my body and mind as well as possible now that I’m getting underway with my new beginnings. Staying in tune with my body and mind is essential in living with multiple sclerosis (MS); my body signals when it’s time to slow down.

Managing my past few weeks has been challenging because I’ve been swamped with schoolwork in my doctoral program. With looming, fixed deadlines, I’ve been working about 10 to 12 hours each day to stay on track. Although I’m sitting at my desk, the mental strain has begun to take a physical toll.

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My tough workweeks

I was typically waking up around 6 a.m. and working until 5 or 6 p.m., but I couldn’t fall asleep immediately because my brain was stuck in mental gymnastics and stress. I’d fall asleep around midnight or 1 a.m. and then do it all again the next day. Even when I did sleep, my dreams were filled with work, making me stressed. Given that, I wasn’t able to find a moment of peace.

Each morning, MS chronic fatigue made my body sore, feeling like a ton of bricks. I’ve dealt with this symptom since before I was diagnosed with MS, but it always worsens when I’m under extra stress. When that occurs, I feel as if no amount of rest or relaxation can fully ease my fatigue’s impact.

In addition to those weeks of fatigue, my left arm and eyes were negatively affected. Since I do all my work on my laptop, I spend a lot of time typing and staring at a screen. After so many hours, the pain in my left eye, caused by past episodes of optic neuritis, is exacerbated, causing a series of migraines.

I’d also experienced a new numbing and tingling sensation in my left index finger, and it radiated up my entire arm. I tried to stop working, but I felt there wasn’t much I could do to find relief. My body had been screaming at me to stop, but I wasn’t listening to the call from inside the house.

Over these past few weeks, I’ve neglected my well-being to complete my work tasks. Although these tasks need to be completed, I’m now trying to be more mindful of knowing when to stop and let my body rest because the work-work-work approach always seems to backfire. My tasks will always get done, but it shouldn’t be at the expense of my health and self-care.


Note: Multiple Sclerosis News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Multiple Sclerosis News Today or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to multiple sclerosis.

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