Guest Voice: Fear shadowed my diagnosis, but I’m stronger than ever
Over time, I learned to focus on what I could control
Aranzazu Calzado, known to friends as Zazu, has lived in Houston, Texas, since 1996 after moving from Spain. She was diagnosed with primary progressive multiple sclerosis in 2021 and faces the challenge with resilience, relying on God, family, and friends as her support network. She finds joy in helping others as a pharmacist, and her passions include travel, photography, reading, cooking, and socializing. Zazu hopes to inspire others on their multiple sclerosis journey and remind them they aren’t alone.
When I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis (MS) in December 2021, it felt like the ground had been pulled out from under me. The news came after years of unexplained symptoms, including fatigue, tingling in my limbs, foot drop, and leg weakness. I’d hoped it was something minor that could easily be fixed. But when the doctor said the words “multiple sclerosis,” my heart sank.
My initial feeling was shock. I’d heard of MS before, but it was always something that happened to other people, not me. The reality of the diagnosis was hard to grasp. I felt like I was in a fog, unable to fully comprehend what it meant for my future. The doctor explained the condition, its potential progression, and the treatment options, but it was difficult to take it all in.
Fear quickly followed the shock. I was scared of what the future held. Would I be able to continue working? How would this affect my relationships? Would I end up in a wheelchair? These questions swirled in my mind, creating a sense of dread that was hard to shake. The uncertainty was overwhelming, and I felt like I was staring into a void.
Sadness was another emotion that hit me hard. I mourned the loss of the life I had envisioned for myself. The dreams and plans I’d made seemed to crumble before my eyes. It was a deep, aching sadness that lingered, making it difficult to find joy in the things I once loved. I felt isolated, as if no one could truly understand what I was going through.
But amid the shock, fear, and sadness, there was also a sense of determination. I knew I had to face it head-on. I started researching MS, learning about the condition, and connecting with others who were living with it. Their stories gave me hope and strength. I realized that while MS was a part of my life, it didn’t have to define me.
Support from family and friends became crucial. Their love and encouragement helped me navigate the emotional roller coaster. They listened to my fears, offered a shoulder to cry on, and reminded me of my resilience. With their support, I began to see that I could still lead a fulfilling life, even with MS.
Acceptance came gradually. It wasn’t easy, and there were days when the fear and sadness resurfaced. But over time, I learned to live with the uncertainty. I focused on what I could control: my diet, exercise, and the treatment plan. I found new ways to enjoy life and set realistic goals for myself.
Being diagnosed with MS was a profound experience that changed me in many ways. It taught me the importance of resilience, the value of support, and the power of hope. While the journey is ongoing, I’ve learned to face each day with courage and optimism, knowing that I’m stronger than I ever imagined.
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About the Author
MADELINE l NEWTON
you have some great strength in dealing with this ,it is at first to swallow for we do have plans that we hope to be able to do in our life time but you can still do them just might have to try a little harder or change the way you plan to do it but you can still do it ....i have learned that we are so much stronger that we thought we were and we CAN DO IT FOR WE ARE STRONG ....enjoy life and do what you would like to do ...take care and enjoy life and your family ....smile.laughter is great and lots of giggles do help alsio...take care and be happy ...smile to the whole world ...keep on keeping on ...laughs
Aranzazu Calzado
Madeline,
Amen to that! It’s so true—God gives us strength in ways we don’t always expect, and with faith and perseverance, we can face anything, including the challenges of multiple sclerosis. It’s all about taking it one day at a time, staying positive, and trusting that we’re stronger than we realize. Here's to thriving, conquering our goals, and supporting each other along the way! Patience, persistence, and faith will get us there, and along the way, we learn, grow, and become stronger. Keep pushing forward—you’ve got this! Zazu
Kim Ahmed
Great article,Zazu! I’m a 22 year veteran of MS, Relapsing Remitting at first now called Secondary Progessive. You keep that progressive fighting attitude! I started with it & hope to keep it til the day I leave the planet. Yes there are days we will cry. But keep fighting, sister!
Aranzazu Calzado
Kim,
Just like our brains constantly find new pathways to learn and grow, we too can adapt and thrive in the face of change and challenge.
Every challenge is an opportunity to discover new strengths and capabilities within us, that we did not know we have until that moment. As they said, "God gives you what you can handle". Let's approach each day with optimism and resilience, knowing that we have the power to shape our future.
Remember, the journey of adaptation is a testament to our incredible potential. Keep pushing forward, stay positive, and watch how you transform obstacles into steppingstones.
Toni Sinclair
Zazu, You are one of the most positive individuals I have ever met. While the diagnosis must have been devastating, I am sure you met it head on, and you will not let this diagnosis define you. You will continue to be the incredible human I know you to be! Much love to you!