fear

I’ve been afraid many times during my life, but I’ve almost always managed to get past the fear. One fear I haven’t gotten past comes with being handed a newborn child for the first time. Every birth might as well be twins: One nurse should hand you your child while…

A patient’s ability to cope with and recover from adversity — called psychological resilience — was found to impact the observed relationship between fear of relapse and life quality among people with multiple sclerosis (MS) in a new study. Essentially, MS patients who had…

Well, dear readers, I finally did it. The recital I’ve been telling you about finally took place after several long delays and a good bit of scrambling, and all those singing lessons were finally put on display for a public audience. I’d like to tell you I stepped…

The last few years have been rough for a whole host of reasons, and I think it’s safe to say that most of us in the United States feel utterly lost and burnt out. There’s no shortage of things to be stressed about and afraid of. I feel like…

Bravado is lost in the blink of an eye. Self-doubt erodes certitude until we find that our default modus operandi is to refuse. Opportunities, happiness, possibilities, and growth seem to pass. This no-risk mentality brings no reward. Chronic illness is a breeding ground for skepticism. We live in a world…

Optimism is kryptonite to the fear and doubt I keep inside. I am grateful for my cheerful disposition because it allows me to maintain balance. But balance is not healing. Left alone, those feelings that I fear ultimately fester. I tend to push aside sadness or frustration. I…

A multiple sclerosis diagnosis is hard to process. Our body that we once knew so well suddenly feels untrustworthy. The truth is that the malfunctioning of our body is a traumatic event. We never expected it to do these things.  We are…

I grew up sailing the San Francisco Bay. My summers were spent in sailing school. My father’s daughter, I loved being on the water. There was no place more peaceful or exhilarating. That serenity turned to turbulence one cold and foggy day. While speeding downwind, our boat broached. The…

I just turned 42, and though I am wiser and stronger and more independent than I was a few decades ago, not everything is coming up roses. Some days, I feel weak and helpless. Other days, I’m overwhelmed. And that’s just part and parcel of life for every human being…

We are living in unprecedented times. Years from now, references will be made to COVID-19. Numbers of those afflicted and those we lost will live on in print. Future generations will learn how phrases such as “social distancing” and “stop the spread” originated. This pandemic will leave a…

No one needs to be reminded of the pandemic we’re in the midst of. We live it every day. The novel coronavirus has attacked with a vengeance, proving that no one is safe from its ruins. The actuality of being quarantined and the practice of social distancing have resulted…

My eyes are closed. Both arms are in a loose “X” across my chest. I feel my heartbeat quicken as I lean back. I fall. For a moment in time, I am afraid. But before fear takes over, a dozen hands cradle me instead. A trust fall. This team-building exercise,…

I am a self-described homebody. I enjoy social gatherings and getting out, but I always look forward to coming home. Within five minutes of pulling into the garage, I am in sweats and a T-shirt. My demeanor immediately softens. Home is familiar, and in familiarity I find safety. Sometimes, safety…

Since the onset of my MS, I have been acutely aware that stress and anxiety can wreak havoc on my body. Being anxious is not a comfortable feeling, whether you have a chronic illness or not. This past weekend was my husband’s celebration of life service. With his…

Courage is a recurring theme in my column. Many of us are familiar with the cowardly lion from the Wizard Of Oz. The lion itself is an animal known for its strength, beauty and valor. Thus, to think of a lion as a coward appears to be a…

Fear of the future will likely rear its ugly head more often than you’d like when you have multiple sclerosis or any serious chronic disease. It can be difficult to keep your mind from wandering to a very dark place. Worries about how fast your disease is progressing,…